Coal to media reps who sell full-page, full-color ads to unsuspecting companies with no media buying experience and no budget to sustain the media buy. The reps know these “single-shots” have no chance of success, but produce great sales margins for the rep. Shame on you for wasting your client’s hard earned money.

Candy to the creative minds behind the radio campaign for Grolsch beer. A beautifully simple concept. Great scripts. Terrific talent. Best visches to everyone involved.

Coal to companies that have groups of men – typically grey-haired men – review and approve advertising for products that are purchased primarily by women. The results are always the same – unattractive designs with “war colors” (red and black) that literally repel female buyers. Wake up, guys. Women have wallets. They either make buying decisions or influence them. Ignore them at your peril.

Candy to the suppliers who bent over backwards to help us meet some very tight deadlines. Great, big bags of candy to Paul Charles at Twisted Pixel, our web development partner, graphic designers Lynn Waghorne and Rod Pipher, and John Kwok at Alchemy Sign Makers.

Coal to both advertising companies and clients who are in the business-to-business category, but want to pretend they are in the packaged goods category. They dwell endlessly on logos and graphic identity and, in the process, waste scads of time and money that would be better spent on marketing fundamentals, such as marketing planning, media buys, messaging…

Candy to clients who appreciate and understand that newspaper advertising is just one of many media options. There is so much more to consider, including the always under appreciated outdoor advertising options, radio – the “secret” weapon of many leading Toronto retailers, and web-based, pay-as-you-go options, such as Goggle advertising.

Coal to car dealerships for producing screaming price point ads that all look the same. Apparently the fine owners of these dealerships have not heard that price is just one part of the car buying experience.

Candy to clients who appreciate it is tough to get anywhere if you don’t first have a destination. This is why we always ask new prospects if they have a marketing plan. If you don’t have a marketing plan, make it job one for 2006.

Coal to agencies and buyers of advertising who produce “say nothing” advertising – and then claim it is not a problem because people “no longer read”. Wrong, wrong, wrong. There is all kinds of research that proves people will read if you give them relevant, well-written advertisements.

Candy to all the companies who understand that market share is not achieved overnight. Market share is earned with customer-focused messaging, delivered in a consistent, targeted media campaign. It’s that simple.

Coal to so-called marketing experts who can’t articulate the USP of the products and/or services they have been hired to market. If you don’t know the USP, how the heck will the customer know the USP? By the way, USP is short for unique selling point.

Candy to all the clients of Words at Work who gave us the opportunity to do some great work this year. We will do our best to remember that we are not in the business of creating advertising. We are in the business of creating sales and profit for our clients.